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Bang Boat
Click here to visit site	Short review: Could those chics guess how far the ‘simple and safe’ the ride aboard the bang boat would take them or how deep the cum would get? Could they be secretly hoping for the ream guns that await them? Or are they that naive and don’t expect a thing. From the looks on their faces they’re doubtless enjoying it, whatever their previous thoughts were.

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• PenisBot's Daily Jokes  
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• Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
• What is grosser than gross?
  When a midget walks by and says your hair smells nice...
• Bill Clinton and Senator Hillary Clinton were at a Yankees game. Before the game began a secret service man came up to him and whispered in his ear.
  Bill Clinton suddenly picked up Hillary and threw her out on the field.
  The secret service man came running up to him and said, "Mr. President Sir, I think you misunderstood me; I said throw out the first pitch."
• Q: Did you hear about the blonde that needed gas money?
  A. She sold her car for it...
• Two teenagers were walking through a park when they saw two rabbits getting it on, fast and furious.
  "What are they doing?" asked the girl.
  "They're jumping rope," said the boy. "Maybe I'll teach you how someday."
  "I think I want you to teach me now," said the girl. So the two went behind some bushes and started getting it on. When the boy had his pants down, the girl asked what that was behind his "rope."
  "That," said the boy, "that's my knot."
  "Well," said the girl, "untie the knot and give me some more rope."
• Why does it take longer to build a snowman than a snowwoman?
  Because it takes so long to hollow out the man's head.
• Man
  So, what do you do for a living?
  Woman
  I'm a female impersonator.
• A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.
  As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?"
  "What dear?" She asked gently.
  "I think you bring me bad luck."
  
• One day a little girl came running into her house yelling, "Mommy, I got five dollars!"
  The mother was curious, so she asked her child where she got the five dollars from.
  The little girl replied, "Tommy down the street gave me five dollars for doing cartwheel while he sat in the tree.
  The mother told her daughter, "Don't you know that Tommy is just trying to see your panties."
  "OOOOhhhh" said the little girl.
  The next day the little girl came running into the house yelling, "Mommy, I got ten dollars. The mother asked, "Where did you get the ten dollars from?"
  The little girl replied, "Tommy down the street gave me ten dollars for doing a cartwheel while he sat up in the tree and laughed."
  The mother replied, "Didn't I tell you that he is..."
  Before the mother could finish, the little girl said, "Wait Mommy. I tricked him, I didn't wear any panties today."
• Two potatoes are walking down the street. One of them is a prostitute. How can you tell which one is the prostitute?
  It's the one that says 'I-Da-Ho.'
• 02/21/2012
• Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
• Q: what do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brunette?
  A: artificial intelligence.
• Man who stuffs his own sausage, pounds his own meat.
• A man was fishing and he caught a crocodile. The crocodile told him, "Please let me go. I'll grant you any wish you desire." The man said, "Okay. I wish my balls could touch the ground."
  So the crocodile bit his legs off.
• Jane was sitting in anatomy class on day when her teacher asked her a question. He inquired, “What grows to 10 times its original size when excited?”
  Jane blushed and said that she didn't know. Jimmy raised his hand and said, “I know! The pupil of the eye.” The teacher replied, “Yes, very good Jimmy.”
  The the teacher turned to Jane and said, “Jane I have three things to say to you: One -- you have a very dirty mind. Two -- you haven't been studying hard enough. And three -- you're going to be very disappointed!”
• Q: What does a blonde say after multiple orgasms?
  A. "Way to go team!"
• Q: Why don't women have men's brains?
  A: They don't have a penis to put them in!
• Three women were sitting around talking about their sex lives.
  The first said, "I think my husband's like a championship golfer. He's spent the last ten years perfecting his stroke."
  The second woman said, "My husband's like the winner of the Indy 500. Every time we get into bed he gives me several hundred exciting laps."
  The third woman was silent until she was asked, "Tell us about your husband."
  She thought for a moment and said, "My husband's like an Olympic gold-medal-winning quarter-miler."
  "How so?"
  "He's got his time down to under 40 seconds."
• An older woman can wear any hat she chooses and nobody will laugh. A younger woman wearing the same hat will always look like a lampshade in abrothel.
• What is a bellybutton for?
  It gives a blonde a place to park her gum on the way down.
• 02/20/2012
• What's the similarity between a woman and dog poop?
  The older they get the easier they are to pick up.
• Q: How many divorced men does it take to change a lightbulb?
  A: None, because they never get the house!
• A wife comes in and yells, "Honey, pack your clothes! I just won the lottery!"
  Her husband yells back, "Should I pack for the beach or for the mountains?"
  The wife replies, "I don't care! Just get the hell out!"
• Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch, doing nothing.
  One old lady turns to the other and asks, "Do you still get horny?"
  The other replies, "Oh sure I do."
  The first old lady asks, "What do you do about it?"
  The second old lady replies, "I suck a lifesaver."
  After a few moments, the first old lady asks, "Who drives you to the beach?"
  
• Chad went to a bar and ordered a drink. A few minutes, a beautiful blonde sat down next to him and started coming on to him. Soon she invited him back to her place. Overcome with excitement, Chad agreed.
  When they got to the bedroom, Chad exclaimed "Wow! A waterbed. I've never had sex on a waterbed before."
  Soon they were both naked and going at it. The blonde stopped him and said, "Before we go any further, don't you think you should put on some protection?"
  "Good idea," he responded and got up. Chad walked out of the room, and when he came back, he was wearing a life preserver.
• Q: What do tofu and a dildo have in common?
  A: They are both meat substitutes.
• Women are only fertile a few days each month... unless they're single.
• Married men live longer than single men - but married men are a lot more willing to die.
• A man was in a bar all day and he had to use the bathroom. He was in there for a while, yelling, so the barmaid reluctantly went to the bathroom to check on him.
  "Sir, what are you yelling about? You're scaring the customers."
  "Every time I try to flush the toilet something keeps biting my balls!"
  "Sir, please get off the mop bucket."
• 1. Cats' facial expressions.
  2. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.
  3. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.
  4. Fat clothes.
  5. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
  6. The difference between beige, off-white, and eggshell.
  7. Cutting your bangs to make them grow.
  8. Eyelash curlers.
  9. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.
  10. Other women.

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